|THIS IS NOT MY LIFE.
||[Apr. 21st, 2008|01:18 pm]
navigating the bad juju
motherfucker. i'm currently staying with my mom and dad. i gave up my life in atlanta because i thought i'd find some kind of new motivation down here, no distractions, like some clarity would suddenly be bestowed to me. SIKE! granted, that wasn't the singular reason for leaving; i was dead broke, i wanted to go on the crazy adventure to nicaragua, and i saw that my parents might benefit from having me around to help with all the shit that's been going on with my pops.|
my friend jen warned me that moving back home would accomplish the exact opposite of what i was looking for...and she was totally right. negativity abounds! all productivity and growth has ceased upon my arrival.
i was so intensely happy the last few months. i miss that. i'm trying to be positive about this situation, but i don't know what the way out is and it's hard.
things have regressed to exactly where they were for me last year. lost, lost, lost.
i'm heading back up to ATL in 11 days (don't make me count down the hours). Goot and i are going to the french broad bluegrass festie outside asheville and it is going to be FUUUUUN chocolates, camping, making out, music. friends, beer, life water + vodka all day (stay hydrated kids!)
i think i may have hopped off that ride too soon. i miss my friends, live music, day-to-night ragers, the brickstore, my job.
i can't do it here. this is not the place for me, and i know it for sure. thank god!
"moving back to florida is like admitting you were wrong."
ok enough depressing bullshit. it is actually a really beautiful day, so i should try to enjoy it.